Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Pedo's Pecker Picture Possession Panned

Newly-acquitted Michael Jackson is now demanding that District Attorney Thomas Sneddon return photographs of his (Jackson's) John Thomas which Sneddon wanted to introduce at the trial. He (Jackson) is afraid the pecker pics will be leaked onto the internet, and that would be most undignified. And we can't have Michael Jackson's dignity assailed, now can we?

The reason the cops wanted the peter pictures was that apparently, back when Jackson was having his skin peel or his drug treatment or whatever it was that he used to transform himself into a Puerto Rican, either the doctors or Androgynous Rex himself didn't want to apply the process to his male organ. Ergo, Jackson's schlong is still black. The boys observed this during their buggery bouts at Neverland, told the cops, and the prosecution wanted to show the jury Jackson's pubic portrait in order to verify the kids' version of events.

Sneddon says he doesn't have the offending pecker pics, which are no doubt in police 8 X 10 glossy like you'd find in the trash at Alice's Restaurant. Gawd, who would want the damned things? Anyone care to make a small bet they really do end up on the Net?

God, this country is a zoo.

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